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                         song lyrics





Well we only chose to list the lyrics that are hard to understand and that most people would want to have close at hand. You can see all of the lyrics at moosebutter's homepage, or go directly to the lyrics page here.

Listed here are:

Captain Organic Vegetable Man

The Googies


Luck o' the Irish

Psycho: The Musical

Star Wars

Turkey Dance


Harry Potter

Uncle Earl's Hairpiece

(please note that all of these were written by Tim)



Captain Organic Vegetable Man

I’m Captain Organic Vegetable Man
I fight against the evilness of pesticides and added colors
If you’re organic then you can proudly stand
And shout for Organic Veggie Man

I’m naturally healthy I don’t ingest pollutants
And though I might wear some makeup no animals were used for testing
No way would I ever cook with MSG
I’m Captain Organic Veggie Man

“Captain Veggie you’re amazing!”
“Time to eat, let’s start grazing.”

Veggie Man he has Potassium
Ten percent of needed Calcium
At dinnertime my plate is full of vegetables

Preservatives and Toxins are against my very nature
And genetic engineering of my carrots makes mad
Farmers applaud me they shout and clap their hands
Hooray for Organic Veggie Man!


The Googies

The Googies are coming the old people say
To buy little children and take them away
50 cents for fat ones
20 cents for lean ones
15 cents for dirty ones
30 cents for clean ones
A nickel each for mean ones

The Googies are coming and maybe tonight
To buy little children and lock them up tight
80 cents for husky ones
Quarter for the weak ones
Penny each for noisy ones
A dollar for the meek ones
Forty cents for happy ones
Eleven cents for sad ones

And kiddies when they come to buy it won’t do any good to cry
But just between yourself and I… they never buy the bad ones



Oh, the big red letters stand for the Jell-O family.
Oh, the big red letters stand for the Jell-O family.
It’s Jell-O! Jell-O pudding! Jell-O tapioca pudding, yessiree!

Living in Utah you’ll have to grin and bear it ‘cuz we like our Jell-O green with shredded carrot.

Oh, I love the way it jiggles when I hold it on my spoon.
Oh, I love the way it jiggles when I hold it on my spoon.
It’s happy! Happy Jell-O! Jell-O Gelatin Desserts™ are very good for me!
Jell-O makes me happy!


Luck o' the Irish

One day when I was walkin’ back from kissin’ the Blarney Stone
I saw walking just ahead a little man, alone
He wore a beard and tiny greenish clothing he had on
I knew at once that I had found my own wee Leprechaun

Now you may not full understand the things that I have told
For if you catch a little man you get his crock of gold
But you be careful, watch him close; be sure to hold him tight
For he’ll slip away as quick as the day if you let him out of your sight.

All day long I chased that little man among the trees
He was like a magic kite flittin’ on the breeze
Wailing like a Banshee he was always just ahead
‘til finally I grabbed him tight and this is what I said:

O Leprechaun your gold, your gold you’ll give me
Or I'll be forced to treat you awful bad
And be so kind as to three wishes grant me
Or I will make your wife and children sad

I thought of all the things I’d buy with all that magic cash
But soon my hopes of fortune all this little man did dash
I guess I’m cursed with all bad luck, though I’m not superstitious.
He said: “Ye cannot have my Lucky Charms: they’re magically deliscious.”


Psycho: The Musical

(to the tune of "The Music in the Night" from The Phantom of the Opera)


Norman Bates was just a motel owner
No one liked him
He was such a loner
Through the wall he sees me
An evil plan connives he
I am nude; I get a sudden fright…

"Reee! Reee!"
Was the music in the night.

Chocolate syrup
billows down the bathtub
He used a knife
He did not use a club

Stabbed me through the curtain,
I am dead for certain
The paper cut I got was more than slight

"Reee! Reee!"
Was the music in the night.

Close your eyes
This scene made the movie rated R
Perhaps you had better leave the room
Alfred Hitchcock he made it so intense

I have not been in a bathroom since

Norman Bates he revved up in his Buick,
Drove it into a pond now it's eewww, ick!
He's done this to others,
Now he must tell Mother

"Norman dear, did she put up a fight?"

"Reeee Reeeee"
Was the music in the night



Star Wars

(in case you wanted to know which theme songs they were doing)


(Close Encounters of the Droid Kind)
You must use the force (repeat ad nauseum)


(Raiders of the Lost Wookiee)
Long time ago, far far away (repeat)

Kiss a wookie, kick a droid
Fly the falcon through an asteroid
Till the princess is annoyed
This is spaceships, it's monsters, it's Star Wars, we love it!

Come and help me, Obi Wan
X-wing fighter and a blaster gun
Dance with Ewoks, oh what fun!
This is spaceships, it's monsters, it's Star Wars, we love it!


(Super Han)
Get in there you big, furry oaf
I couldn't care less what you smell
I take orders from only me
Maybe you’d like it back in your cell
Your Highness, your worshipfulness, your highness, your worshipfulness

No one cares if you upset a droid
(nobody cares if you upset a droid)
That's because droids don't tear your arms out of socket.
(nobody cares)
I suggest a new strategy: let the Wookie win
That's because nobody cares if you upset a droid.


(ET the DiscoTerrestrial)
Now we listen to Luke whining:
One more season… One more season… One more season… One more season…

I was gonna go to Tashi Station for power converters
Now I guess I'm going nowhere.
It just isn't fair.


(Jaws: the Wookiee)
Wooookie (repeat)

Someone move this walking carpet (repeat)

Kiss your brother, Kiss your brother (repeat)

Princess Leia
Well I guess you don't know anything about women.

Who's your daddy? (repeat)


(Jurassic Darth)
Luke, I'm your father
(That's not true!)
It is useless to resist
(My hand!)
Come with me my son, We will rule
(I'll never join you!)
Search your feelings it is true

So you have a twin sister
Who Obi Wan was wise to hide
(Is that Leia?)
If you will not turn
Then perhaps she will
Give in to your hate
You are mine


Long Long Long Time ago… Far Far Far Far Away

Long Long Long Time Ago, Far Far Far Away (repeat)

Kiss a wookie
Kick a droid
Fly the falcon
Through an asteroid
Till the princess is annoyed
(She's annoyed!)
This is spaceships, it's monsters, it's Star Wars, we love it, it's true

Episode 3
Coming to you
In 2005

So Let's go
(go go go to the movies)
Stand in line
(buy buy buy me some popcorn)
Cause it's al-
(please I'd like extra butter)
most the time
(Join the dark side…)
May the Force be with you all

John Williams is the man


Turkey Dance

I found a turkey in my shoe doing a turkey-kind of exotic dance that some other turkey might find attractive but I don’t really find it attractive actually it makes me feel straaaaange.

Hey, don’t do that in my shoe or I might have to call MisterBugEyes have him come look at you with his bug eyes I don’t think I like MisterBugEyes makes me think of a bug with big eyes makes me feel kind of straaaaange.

MisterTurkey … oh, I’m sorry … I’m not sure what is your gender … turkey tender

Do you wanna dancing turkey?
Don’t provoke the dancing turkey.
Play charades with dancing turkey.
Came from Russia: dancing turkey.
Not salami: dancing turkey.
Captain Kirk loves dancing turkey!
Arctic bird dance? Dancing turkey.
Shiny adverb… dancing turkey.
Touch… the lightbulb… dancing turkey…




I love you.
You love Doug.
I don't really like Doug.

You love Doug.
Doug loves Martha.
Martha don't really like Doug.

Doug loves Martha.
Martha loves Brad.
Brad don't really like Doug.

Brad loves Sue.
Sue loves TRUTH.
TRUTH don't really like Doug.





Harry Potter

Harry Potter, you live beneath the stairs.
Harry Potter, you've got unruly hair.
Harry Potter, the giant Hagrid he comes to call
You're not a Muggle after all

Harry Potter, you've got a cloaking cape
Harry Potter, beware Professor Snape
Harry Potter, up in the tower you have your room
You started flying on a broom

Harry Potter I'm quite sure
You'll like your life in Gryffindor
Harry Potter, you cast your spell on me
Harry Potter, when school starts
You'll fight against the darker arts
Harry Potter you cast your spell on me

Harry Potter, your books are super keen,
I love your bogey-flavored jelly bean.
Harry Potter, you're playin' Quidditch up in the sky
But just beware the evil eye.
(Voldemort! Aaah!)

Harry Potter, I think you will go far
Harry Potter, I dig your facial scar
Harry Potter, when you grow up what will you be?
When will you marry Hermione?
(Book Seven)
(I do...ha ha... I'm so pretty..ha ha..

Harry Potter, please don't end
Harry Potter, you're my friend
Harry Potter, I'll miss you when you're gone

Harry Potter, let me look
At the end of the seventh book
I gotta know how things turn out for you

Harry Potter



Uncle Earl's Hairpiece

Once I was eaten by a man-eating great white shark
Once I was crushed by an anvil when it fell from the sky
Once an old man in a wicker chair smote me with his mind powers
Once I leapt off a cliff when I thought I could fly

But of all the things that happened, being shot or boiled in hot grease
Yeah, of all the things that happened
They can't be as bad as the time I ate my Uncle Earl's hairpiece

Once I was pursued across the Bering Strait by mafiosa eskimos
I had two tons of uranium surgically embedded in my head
I was chewed upon by hungry kittens of a rare Siberian white tiger
Scary guys from Fiji made me use a hot volcano for my bed

But of all the things that happened, being stoned or insulted by my niece
Yeah of all the things that happened
They can't be as bad as the time I ate my Uncle Earl's hairpiece

Uncle Earl is not known for his hygiene
Oooh Chaka Khan
He has the aroma of old cod
Zeegan za Fleegan
He's perfected perfuse perspiration
Sweaty uncle! Bleah bleah!
Believe me his flavor's very odd

Once I was trampled by a crazed mob of teenage girls
I found myself on the business end of Genghis Khan's wrath
My innards were consumed by a virulent alien bacteria
My poor brain was pureed when I tried to do math

But of all the things that happened, licking feet or chewing on fleece
Yeah of all the things that happened
They can't be as bad as the time I ate my Uncle Earl's hairpiece

Once I was blindsided by a hurricane and carried off to fairyland
I spent six long years employed as a dummy that they used for crashing cars
I was slowly stalked and taken out by poorly wardrobed culinary ninjas
I was punished for my jokes and exiled to the darker side of Mars

But of all the things that happened, being gonged or mistaken by Maurice
Yeah of all the things that happened
They can't be as bad as the time I ate my Uncle Earl's hairpiece

It was sitting on the kitchen table
I mistook it for a corn soufflé
I had eaten nearly seven-twelfths of that wretched thing
Before I realized my mistake!

Looks like hair
Feels like hair
Tastes like hair
Not real hair
I don't wanna eat hair